Chain of Command QR Sheet Monday, Sep 16 2013 

Chain of Command is the new platoon level wargame from the Too Fat Lardies. Rich has produced a QRS. However before that had been published I had already started my own. These I feel are the best lay out.

Sheet 1 – Command and Movement
Sheet 2 – Combat and Morale
Sheet 3 – Vehicle Combat.

Please note some suspected anomalies have been double checked by people on the Lardies Yahoo Group, specifically 1) 0 and 1 net hits on soft skins and 2) The difference between Road and Broken wheeled movement: ALL hard ground counts as Road.

UPDATE 19 Sept 13. Updated to amend a couple of errors that had crept in.

Quick Reference Sheet

I Ain’t Been Shot Mum cards Saturday, Feb 9 2013 

I present four sets of cards, one for each of the major European combatants, fot the Too Fat Lardies wargame “I Ain’t Been Shot Mum”. Rather than boring cards with just the words on, these contain period images (except a couple of modern ones thrown up by image search on Google and Bing where no other period image was found).

British Cards

US cards

Soviet Cards

German Cards

Card Backs

Included in each set is a Nation specific ‘Tea Break’ card, as well as a propagander poster for an ‘Umpire Card’ and a untitled portrait of the national wartime leader to use as a ‘joker’ or second umpire card, or what ever (though neither Churchill or Stalin were the head of state). There is also a ‘Title Card’ to stick on the outside of a box you keep them in.

Each set’s background is colour coded: Green for the US, Red for USSR etc.

The fifth file is Card Backs of the title panel from the 3rd edition rules – reproduced by kind permission of Chief Lardie Richard Clarke. If you flip the printed sheet over these SHOULD line up, assuming you use the same top edge both times (you’ll note the larger space at the bottom than the top, though left and right margins are identical).

When I print cards at home I print on plain paper then laminate before cutting up. If anyone wants the jpegs of the cards to send to a commercial printer to place on proper cards, such as ‘Artscow’, let me know.

EDIT: Word of caution – just thought: these are on A4 paper – not sure what will happen on US ‘Letter’ size paper!

To the best of my knowledge all images (except the ‘modern’ ones) are free of copyright, being owned and made available by various national governments. Where possible I have included the title of the picture to give some sort of background to what it is of. The modern ones are from image search, and uncredited, though may be advertising.

Kiss Me Hardy – Data sheets for Minor ships at Trafalgar Monday, Jan 28 2013 

I’ve previously posted ship data sheets for the ships of the line at Trafalgar for the Too Fat Lardies rules “Kiss Me Hardy”.


Here are the other ships present, 5th rates or unrated. They didn’t fight but scouted beforehand or picked up survivors. The Pickle was the ship that took the news of Trafalgar, both the victory and Nelson’s death, back to Britain.

Trafalgar minor ships

Making cards for Two Fat Lardies games Monday, Dec 17 2012 

Fans of Two Fat Lardies games will be used to making cards for the games.  This can be a bit of a hassle-  doing it in either a word-processor or a graphics package is a pain.


You can download the Magic Set Editor.  This lets you make extra cards (no making your own packs/duplicates of rare cards!) for your favourite card games

You can download lots of different templates (make you own Top Trumps!)

Examples for ‘I ain’t been shot mum’

I then use artscow to print off packs.  You need 54 cards (artcow allows you 2 jokers), plus a card back.  You can choose to have the suits on or off the cards.

The cards are very good quality, comparable to ‘proper cards’.

You may say ‘Hold on that’s £7 a pack’.  Yes (however they are always giving out promo codes), but how much do figures cost? Terrain?  Lets face it, its only 2-3 beers.  Wargamers spend lots, another few pounds for good quality cards is surely worth the investments

(Second) First game of Dux Britanniarum Sunday, Sep 30 2012 

Dux Britanniarum (DB henceforth) is the new Early Medieval (aka Dark Ages) game from the Two Fat Lardies.  I had played in the demo game at the Newbury Wargames Show about a month ago, but Friday night was the first time I’d played where I had any true grasp of the rules.  The are specifically designed for the early period, Romano British v invading Saxons, 5th century stuff, though they could easily be used with later periods.

My regular opponent ‘Sunjester’ had bought the rules, along with the card packs (more later) for £25, as he had lots of 25mm figures that hadn’t seen a table for some years.  The book is approx 100 pages from the look of it, printed on high quality glossy paper in colour and ‘perfect bound’, similar to the TFL recent releases ‘I Ain’t Been Shot Mum’ (version 3) and ‘Charlie Don’t Surf’.  The pro’s and cons of the increase of production values is argued on wargame fora across the internet, so I won’t go into them here, except to say I liked the general look.  The card packs are playing card sized, rather than the oversize cards produced for IABSM.


I ain’t dead… Monday, Feb 13 2012 

…to quote Granny Weatherwax.

Between writing my ‘book’ (currently at 80,000+ words) and planning the Kriegspeil for this coming Saturday, I’ve been a bit busy, computer-wise.

The Kriegspiel is getting to be a bit big:  not only am I lead Umpire (PANIC), but it looks like 10+ attendees.  It’s different in concept to other K-S I’ve played/helped umpire: it’s all about the planning.  I joked that I’m looking forward to the 19th, as I get my inbox back!

Sunday I will (hopefully) publish an AAR, plus the rules I wrote, along with the counters etc.

‘Market Garden’ scenario for Troops Weapons and Tactics. Sunday, Dec 4 2011 

Originally entered in the Too Fat Lardie scenario writing competition (didn’t win!)

Based on an incident from the siege in Arnhem, and an attempt to write a multi player scenario for TW&T – not a game that normally lends its self to more than one player a side.

Bloody Berets

Wargame figure calculator Wednesday, Sep 21 2011 

A Excel spreadsheet to help you order figures when the figures come in multiple (eg 30 x 10mm figures in a bag, box of 10 Space Marines).  Break each unit down into its composition ‘types’ – adjust the ‘Ordered’ column until the ‘Total Units’ amount reads the same, then it calculates the cost.


Napoleonic Casualty Calculator Thursday, Sep 1 2011 

Following a discussion of 2 line vs 3 line on TMP, I wrote a spreadsheet to calculate the difference.  You can set the number of men in each battalion, including the split between the front 2 firing ranks of a French battalion, and those in reserve who fill gaps, as well as the assumed accuracy that will cause a wound severe enough to put a man out of battle.

It is fairly crude on maths, as it makes a number of assumptions:

  1. Kill rate as a % stays constant.
  2. Those filling gaps do so before the next volley
  3. A straight 1 on 1 firefight
  4. Wounds are cause simultaneously – ie it calculates hits before subtracting wounds.  If you want one side to fire first, reduce the strength of the other to start.

The way it calculates the remaining men in the 3 rank bn is by applying all casualties to the 3rd rank (non firers).  When this reaches zero it subtract the overkill from the firing ranks (well it adds the negative number).

Casualty calculator

Excel 97 version

Excel 97 version

War of Spanish Succession – Open Thread. Monday, Aug 15 2011 

A poster going by the name of ‘Little Keithy’ expressed surprise at hitting the thread on the riots, when he came here looking for stuff about the War of Spanish Succession.  He was obviously not expecting the somewhat eclectic nature of my blog (read ‘any old rubbish that comes to mind’, refered to by my wife as spending half the night on the internet ranting at people).  Unlike many wargamers this isn’t a wargame only thing. (It originally started as I wanted to share some fiction I had written with bloggers from other sites I frequent, for their opinion).

He wrote

Anyway what I was going to ask: what’s the allure of the WSS? I like the SYW as there is a variety of troop types plus nice uniforms to paint (not that I ever get round to painting them).

The WSS appears to the uninitiated limited in troop types (in western europe), tactics and pretty uniforms (nice whigs though). Is it more a test of skill having limited opportunities for a coup de grace or clever manoeuvre?

Well, to tell the truth, I chose the period based on hats… (more after the break)


French in the War of Spanish Succession – painting guide Saturday, May 21 2011 

French painting guideI put together this basic painting guide for a friend. As we do 10mm only the major bits are identified – no lace etc.


The flags should print roughly the correct size for 10mm, I believe they are from the rather fine “Warflag” site.

Random Platoon Generator for Troops, Weapons and Tactics Sunday, May 1 2011 

This spreadsheet will generate a random (British) platoon for Troops, Weapons and Tactics/Platoon Forward. Of course it can be used for any other platoon level wargame (NUTS etc) though you will have course have to tweak the stats. For reference TI is Tactical initiative, and runs from 1 (plodder) to 4 (heroic). The Big Man Bonus is the extra added when a leader is directing fire (Typically 3d6-3 for rifles up to 4d6+4 for MG42, the results table maxing at 36). Making the Big Man drop down YES shows the values for that man (TW&T is not normally interested in non leaders). I have defaulted the Lance Corporals, who lead the Bren gun group to BM, as they may well be called on to replace a killed section leader during a battle.

I suggest that you put ‘Workbook Calculation’ (found under Options/Formulas) to Manual, otherwise everything changes each time you change a cell. F9 is the manual update. Use Copy then “Paste Special –>; Values” to put the results you want to keep onto a fresh spreadsheet (this pastes results, rather then the formulae, so won’t keep getting updated).

Note – this is a Excel 2007 spreadsheet, so has the extension .xlsx (see below for a possible earlier version)

Random lists

This is the version saved as compatable with Excel 1997-2003. I can not guarantee which bits (if any) will work. If anybody wants to do a rewrite I’d be happy to work with them on it.

Random lists excel 97

Rights/IP stuff. I’m providing this free for personal non-commercial use, the basic work remains mine. I haven’t put anything malicious into it, but I can provide no warrenty etc etc yadda yadda yadda. Feel free to edit the names/platoon layout for other nations – I’ll happily upload it here or provide a link to where ever you host it: My Gmail address is (unsurprisingly) Last.Hussar@…

Black Powder – Broken Brigades Saturday, Mar 5 2011 

The Broken Brigade rule in ‘Black Powder’ is considered overly harsh by many players.  These are the amended rules we play.

1) A brigade is broken when OVER half the units in it are shaken or destroyed.  i.e.  in a six unit brigade 4 units shaken/destroyed are required to break the brigade – not 3 as per the rules.

2) Units in a broken brigade can be rallied if the ‘break’ status is due to Shaken units, and disordered units may reform.  For the above  brigade with 6 units

– if 4 are destroyed, the Brigade is permanantly Broken

– If 3 are destroyed, and one Shaken, the Shaken unit may be rallied.  Once it is no longer Shaken, the brigade is no longer Broken.  Remember ‘Rally’ is the last order a commander may give. 

– if 2 are destroyed and 3 Shaken, then 2 must be rallied to 2 hits or less to ‘unbreak’ the brigade.

While a brigade is broken it must still retire on initiative so units are more than 12 away from the enemy.  As movement on initiative counts as an order, a further Rally order can not be given that turn.  This encourages the opponent to keep up pressure on Broken Brigades to stop them reforming, rather ignore broken brigades that are almost useless.

We feel this method is a fairer reflection.  It also means that cavalry, who are easy to shake due to their hand to hand role, act like historical accounts – they charge, become blown and spend some time reforming before rejoining the fight.

“Black Powder” wargame rules – Moving in towns/villages. Monday, Feb 14 2011 

Playing Black Powder the other night I left a town in the centre of our lines with no one in it: My brain said obsticle, though we had not designated it as such.  This was almost our undoing.  However built up areas – ven if just a collection of wattle and daub houses do obstruct an army.  What do people think of these compromise rules.  They are designed so you don’t have to represent individual houses and roads.

Represent the town with a template.  It can have buildings on but these are for show – move them around to allow the troops to move!  If a specific piece of open ground is desired  this can be marked – town rules do not apply for units on it.

Units can only enter a town/village in ‘Assault column’ (even if in a period where not normally used).  Rules for assault columns are used as normal.

No change to command rules except blunders happen on a 11 as well (in a village or town its easier to get disorientated, as you can’t see the rest of the battle field, so not appreicate that the road curves, or you take a wrong turning).

A unit can take up residence in buildings – place in a ‘square’ style formation to show this, the unit uses the rules in the book for buildings (not squares).

Maximum fire range in a town is 6″.

Units outside of buildings (ie in Column) do not get the benefit of cover if fired at by other units in the town.

A Line Infantry may deploy into line at the edge of a town.  It does NOT get cover unless the settlement has be designated as providing it on that edge before the game.  A unit may enter buildings at the edge of town, so it can fire out. Infantry in skirmish order DOES count cover.

Shooting into towns from outside has a maximum line of site of 3″ from the edge.  In this case columns DO get cover.

War of Spanish Succession for ‘Black Powder’ Tuesday, Feb 1 2011 

“… & Blenheim Palace” (Do you see what I did there?)

These are the playtested (and amended, and playtested again, and amended again) rules we use for War of Spanish Succession with Warlord’s “Black Powder” wargame rules.  These are independent of Warlord and the original writers.

Blenheim Palace v2.2  (PDF)

I know some will bring up specific situations where some of these will not be applicable, or counter to what happened at certain battles.  I think these sort of instances are better handled in scenario specific rules.

Please remember the aim of these are to add the flavour of the period, not an indepth study of early 18th century warfare, so while I’m happy to receive constructive comments, Black Powder remains at its heart a game for Gentlemen played with Toy Soldiers!  I wished to stop two identical armies being fielded, especially with the cavalry rules.  Here I wanted there to be an actual difference beween armies using the two doctrines.  More notes on page 8.

You actually only need pages 3-7.  The other pages are bells and whistles to make sure it prints correctly for double sided, as well as following the style of the ‘eye candy’ original rules.  Also 8 pages means it can be placed on A3 and make a booklet.

Click the Black Powder tag to the left for all BP related posts by me – there are a number, including a battle report, and my modification to the Broken Brigade rules. The tag at the top does all the BP entries across WordPress, so you’ll also find other people’s take on the rules (some contributed on my earlier WSS rules post – Thank you)

Play Nicely, and may all your dice be lucky.

Next Page »